That Guy loves Russia

So did anyone hear about the meteor that hit Russia? According to the news, it hit a lake or some type of body of water and reduced the impact. Maybe it wasn't even a meteor? What if the Russians are actually communicating with Aliens behind our backs and are receiving some crazy technology from them to use on America? Or maybe space is just returning all the shit that Russia launched into the atmosphere? So many questions, so little answers (that we know of). The only reason America fears Russia is because of Communism. For those who do not know what that is, it's when the government gives everyone money and farmland and part of what they make goes to Russia. Unlike Amurrica, Russia gives to the rich AND the poor (see what I did there). Don't get me wrong! I love Amurrica, everything's either deep-fried or wrapped in bacon in Amurrica (plus, where would we be without diversification and Hooters?). Back to the point, what if Russia was blessed with the meteor because it contains a whole new element or chemical that can cure cancer or fuel cars without pollution? You gotta think positive people! Russia could use this draw-back to their advantage by creating the Russian Power-Puff Girls with this new chemical X or they could actually become the new Power-Puff girls! But then again, all Russians are bears on unicycles. MESSAGE.